Feb 162015
 

One of my New Year resolutions is to revive this site..and continue in Titling your naughty bone. As a part of it-Here comes my first blog for this year where I am doing little bit of a naming ceremony and you are all invited to join me hands in going through this christening function –

LOLitha – The kind of girls who uses LOL extensively on chats, FB, Twitter, WhatsApp etc absolutely for anything and everything.
Eg :

Status 1: My GrandPa..died and I miss him.. :-(
LOLitha: RIP Grandpa..LOL :-)
(WTF..Whats LOL in losing a GrandPa..?)

Scene 1: A beautiful sun rise picture being shared on FB
LOLitha : LOL.. :)
(Errr..I have no idea what LOL has to do with a Sun set..nor what is so Hilarious about Dawn)

Scene 2: Someone would have shared a nice cute picture of their kid
LOLitha : You have a nice kid ..LOL.. 😀
(This freaks me out. Unless the Kid is a hobbit or has something funny, I really don’t get it what is there to Laugh Out Loud on that..)

These LOLithas confuse me more than making me get infuriated. Is it only me who is susceptible to their dumb humor..? Probably not..LOL..(Oops..I don’t want to become a LOLith now)

scootyHORSEitha : This appreciation goes exclusively to women riders on Indian roads who ride a Scooty/Activa/Zing whichever of such kind of vehicles. But one funny thing we can observe is the way the vehicle is ridden. Most of the time I see that the legs are in splits and are left free to each of the sides dangling in air as if your are riding a horse without a saddle. This reminds me of Road Rash game where the riders can kick other riders or the police whoever is passing by for extra bonus points. Women – Please tell me, is riding the vehicle that much difficult or is it a style to ride like that..I still don’t understand. Guys next time when you see a HORSEitha just yell at her “Nice horse..Madam”..! :)

DUCKshitha (This is not Dhakshitha) : The name says it all. Hail all those ultra-young and modern Selfie faceaficionados no matter what, which position they are in, when anyone says pose for the camera..an involuntary awkward muscle protuberance happens with an instant pout on their lips. Whether they are undergoing labor pains..or they in middle of floods or tasting a lime..doesn’t matter. You say let’s take a snap then immediately their DUCK hormones gets activated and poof they are ready with a pout. Girls – Excuse us..if you feel it is style and makes u feel as sultry siren..you are wrong. All it makes us feel is to become the greedy farmer in the story “The Duck that lays a Golden Egg”.

isSHITha : The special clan of girls who are very much culture centric and show as if they are the incarnation of Indian values and in reality their traditional acumen will as big as a pea. Eg: You can see them wearing Indian dresses (Chudidhars, Saree) even in Minus degree temperatures when they come onsite. They give lengthy lectures if we suggest them to change. The chill will be hitting till their waist line from bottom, still they are ok not to wear jeans or any western wear and on top speak ill of those who does.

Let me get the truth-o-meter here. The reality is :

  • Most of them will be bodily-challenged to fit in such clothes
  • Will be very miserly afflicted to spend money
  • Have husband or Boyfriend who are a combo of the above two points
  • Have the exposure quotient the size of a NUTgame

These kind of girls won’t even mind to wear Saree/Ghagra Choli to play beach volley ball or a football match and elevate the traditional values as high as a punctured ball goes. Wish to put some sand into my eyes than see this..God Bless them.

SUSUmitha : Haahhaa..This name made me laugh just by its mere sound. wcThe kind of a person who is addicted to going to loo wherever they go. Unless they bless the restroom in that place, their heart won’t be in content. Doesn’t matter where they go. Be it if they get into a flight, go to a new area, go to beach, go to a carnival, friends place, shopping mall..etc. Even if they become an astronaut and go to moon, first thing to do after going there is to do..SU SU. Long live the bladder..

FACEitha : You see them everywhere and almost every day. The evidences of these kinds of species is growing huge day by day and still counting. The interesting cute bubbly type of young girls and wives who keep selfies of their faces but nothing else. Some of the DUCKshitas you find in this category. If you continue clicking their next 50 pics of theirs, it will all be just faces faces and faces. Lucky be the one who finds a full length pic of them. But 95% chances is that it will be minimum 3 years old snap. If you ask me WHY..?I also don’t know but once you see them in full then probably you may understand the reason. No comments..just be watchful.

So my dear Buddies – Next time you get to see or come across these kinds of esteemed genre, don’t forget to think of these names and have a chuckle. And do let me know in comments of any other types you can categorise accordingly. Anyways as Shakespeare once said ..All is fine on Twitter and Facebook. Nail them all. Oops..I mean, Hail them all..

Rating 4.50 out of 5
Mar 292013
 

This blogs goes spiraling back into my childhood days when all I keep thinking was about how life on this planet did have a start. This thought made me to past forward my learning from the Biology classes that life started from a single celled organism. God only knows how that is possible. May be the word “Buffet and Self service” was coined considering this act. Keeping the “Big Bang theory” aside from one of my previous posts, despite getting kinky thoughts on this word, this curiosity regarding life started increasing as things started growing UP.

Due to this inquisitiveness, I started reading lot of books and watched channels like animal planet and NGC. Being a curious child, my brain started becoming a laboratory for virtual prototypes. I even made a Daddy Horse and Mummy Rhino and their baby Unicorn. I even took the three models to my origami class. My teacher asked me where I got this idea and I said Animal Planet. She asked me to watch more of cartoon network. That day I watched Ariel on cartoon network. I started thinking who Ariel’s mummy is.  Right from childhood I was always considerate to mummies and my neighborhood aunties. One of the plausible reasons might be due to me spending more time in their laps than in my huggie naps. Thanks to my Mom for she giving me away to all our neighbors to retain her peace of mind. So out of this consideration, in my next class I asked how do mummy mermaids make babies? She said about the stork bringing the babies and regarding the daddy part she skipped it. I was happy for the answer at least some one is making babies somewhere and should be more of a cottage industry I felt.

Throughout my schooling I always had tough time understanding the reality of life. Once my teacher was teaching about hybrid plants and how strong they are to sustain drought and extreme weather conditions. She gave an example of a mule too. I was so fascinated by the story and I once again made my own Mule family. Daddy Mule, Mummy Mule and Baby Mule with clay and took them to my class. My teacher tried to explain the major design flaw of hybrids but failed to convince me. Later I realized the inevitable that they can’t make babies. Sad but true. There after I was sent out of the class many times for my curious questions which has become a routine for me in every Biology and moral science class subsequently.

Later, the time has come that my Dad came to me and tried to initiate talk regarding Birds and Bees. That was the most entertaining talk I ever had with my Dad. Birds and Bees…I thought Whoa..is more like an orgy. Then I added one more to my interest list to see how a bird can make it out with a bee. Beaks Vs Stings which would win..damn the though itself felt so gay so dropped the thought over all. As the disappointment ruminating in my mind, the time has come for me to join the college. When we are searching for which college I should join I came across, one college that said “B.R.A Open University”. The whole of my childhood questions just befell and thought if I have to study in any college this is it. Felt I just discovered stair case to heaven. To my dismay I later learn that it is “Bheem Rao Ambedkar Open University” for vocational courses. The stair case crumbled altogether. Now as I got married and undergoing the nuptial bliss, the importance of all my learning made me realize just one thing. As Darwin said..Natural selection is the key for all Life to happen, that leads to spermutations and combinations. So going back to my initial learning, whether life would have started from a single celled organism or not…but sure the trails would have got started from a single cell’s orgasm. God Bless us All..Amen..Ahh Women..!!

Shares your Qs and any related thoughts you had in your childhood as comments. Waiting for..

 

 

 

Rating 4.67 out of 5
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